Vices like Vipers

these lyrics never cease to amaze me...

Your scarlet soaked and bold
and the sheep's eyes locked to mine, sink to my bones.
Though your lips still drip, intentions, they keep me wanting more...
It's rising against all the walls we built for falling.
All the walls we built just stand in vain to draw you near.
It's the wool to hide the wolves.
And under these toes from where we last spoke, Your words laid so firm.
But I did not shed that skin like You said.
When the mason neglects the mortar, looks become deceiving
and when the bricks start to fall,
I'll be the one crawling down this road so dark.
Vices like vipers
Speak in whispers.
My heel's the meat to sink their teeth,
Like the viper I kept when You said, "Let go!"
This is what it took for me to see.
When I am God this church is unsound.
Slithering in the shade of a sinking church,
Surprise is no excuse for the traps that you left in the wake of warning.
So this is the warning, You fall to learn.
And to the girls,
You're worth more than the cheap words.
You see your body as beauty, but your pulse is worth more.
Hear me, it's not what it seems, though the feeding tastes of honesty.
This is the warning, you're just a hit to coax my urgency.
Why do we keep what holds us? Why do I keep what holds me down?
Lose the weight of defeat. It's time to stand your ground!
Vices like vipers
Speak in whispers.
My heel's the meat to sink their teeth,
Like the viper
I kept when You said, "Let go!"
Since all the alibis of ignorance are void...
This, my lust, the pornos and the sluts.
Take, my lust, this world's Love.
Great Councilor, take what's left.
Great Councilor, take what's left of me.

-Oh, Sleeper

pain is for a reason

looking back at the past year of my life, i have to say it has been quite an adventure. so much has gone on and so much in my life has changed.
i have changed.
relationships have been broken, others made. tears have been shed but joy has always come after it. hearts have been broken and unfortunately, have left to be mended. sadness and change come, but life goes on, whether we like it or not.
seeing who i was and who i am, in a way, it's amazing i'm even here. i have been through so much heartache. i have experienced loneliness, betrayal, hatred, abandonment, and so many other mixes of feelings and emotions, they can't be put down in words.
in the past year and a half of my life you would see 2 completely different people.
i used to be extremely unhappy. depression constantly followed me. you would hardly ever see me smile. i clung to a person who could not help me but could only make things worse and increase my heartache. endless nights would be spent crying myself to sleep, wishing i was dead so i wouldn't have to hurt anymore.
so i wouldn't have to feel pain.

now. it's a different story.

i really don't think that i would trade those painful moments in for anything. they have made me who i am. the pain, the hurt, the betrayal, the heartache, the tears, all of it has been for a reason. without them, i don't think i could love like i do today. i couldn't relate to others and what they are going through. i couldn't smile like i do now. i wouldn't be who i am now.

that's it. i can't write down every emotion, feeling, or experience into fancy words that would touch your heart or move you to tears. but i can be honest with you. that's what i would want from other people. so i'm going to leave you with this: when those hard times come, don't wallow in self-pity. just remember, that "weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning."(Psalm 30:5)

there is Someone who does care.

quote

Music is what feelings sound like.
-unknown

some of my inspiration

so since i'm not really sure where to start i guess i'll just start with something that has inspired me. these are a couple of my favorite songs from my favorite band.

Anberlin- Paperthin Hymn



Anberlin-The Unwinding Cable Car

#1

so i have to confess i'm not much of a writer but a lot of things have been on my mind lately. so i decided to start a blog. i don't know what it is about writing on a blank screen and having the freedom to write what you want that is so liberating but i have figured that it will help some. i figured that i have a voice, a small one, but nevertheless a voice and maybe i just want to be heard. so i am going to try to find the motivation to write often.
i would also like to hear your opinions and ideas so feel free to submit them.
thanks.